DOG OF MANY NAMES

Wowie zowie, where does the time go? One minute it was summer hot and in a blink of an eye it's gone cold here in northwest Montana. There is already snow on the high peaks.

Hard to believe I have not written on my blog for almost a month. This summer was hot, hot, hot but now it's cold and rainy. Actually, I prefer the cooler weather. We have been working hard getting the firewood, cut, split and in the shed. Mostly, I have been supervising.

I really got Kinsey a good one the other day. We were out working in the woods. Kinsey was occupied with the chain saw and not paying attention to me. Whilst she wasn't looking I slipped into Mr. Toad and stole her peanut butter sandwich. Yum! She was hopping mad. I am a food thief let there be no doubt about that. Other favorite teases are stealing her gloves and her hat.

For the longest time I was leery of riding in Mr. Toad but now I'm getting the hang of the thing and run and jump in when called. I actually look forward to it now.

My latest nickname is Buddha Baby. I've now got many. Kinsey tells me that when she first saw me, the thing that struck her was how I sat like a little Buddha and calmly observed all the chaos around me. Then, the other day, a tree faller came to cut down trees and brought his border collie mix puppy along. Her name was Oakley, for Annie Oakley. Anyway this gal was a pistol, pardon the pun, and knocked me all over the place. I put up no resistance. She chased me and knocked me down until she wore herself out. She wore us both out.  Oakley is 8 months old and I'm 10. I out weigh her by 2. Kinsey says I'm built like a brick poop house. I suppose some would say that makes me the submissive or omega type dog. But, Kinsey sees it as being the wise dog and that's why she calls me her Buddha Baby.

Another new nickname. You're gonna love this one. Ling Ling. She calls me that because she thinks I look like a panda especially when I run. I bunch up just like a bear and my white shawl and black coat makes me look like a panda racing through the grass. Well that's what she says. But, she has quite an imagination that gal!

Another Kinsey favorite is Pond Scum Puppy. I got this one from jumping in the ponds this summer. The ponds are beautiful and pristine but honestly, the water has a bit of a pond scum aroma which I carry with me after my plunge. A rather insulting nickname but I get it.

The mule deer have returned. That's a real sign fall has arrived. I'll have to be teaching them who rules the roost around here. I think they are going to be a lot more fun than the whitetail. The whitetail are really skittish but the mulies like to play. Kinsey likes the mule deer better too. She says they are more elegant both in their looks and their demeanor.

©Kinsey Barnard

Me in the tall grass near a felled larch

Me racing down the hillside. I think I heard the dinner bell!

This would have been a great picture if you know who hadn't cut my butt off!

Kinsey has been chopping wood like a madwoman. The shed is full and then some!

Recently returned mule deer doe.

THE PURINA DIET

A good friend of mine from Texas sent me this bit of pet and retired people humor. Very funny.

"Yesterday I was at my local Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant?

So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Wal-Mart won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say."

PHOTO OF THE DAY

This would be me after two weeks of crate and house training